California Sober - Byeeeeeee!

Big changes lead to big results. I've made a lot of big changes in my life in recent years, starting with quitting drinking on Labor Day 2016. My habits shifted quite a bit at that time, mostly for the better but my marijuana use saw a huge incline. I had essentially replaced one addictive habit with another one and told myself it was fine because I never woke up and had regrets about what I said or did when I smoked too much pot (well, maybe a little regret over late night snack binges). That's the thing, it's all good until it isn't, right?

I've done a lot of research on addict brain; if you don't know what that is take a quick second to be thankful. Addict brain tells you that you are constantly in need of something (drugs, alcohol, sex, attention, and on and on), even if you JUST had it. And if you're like me and know all too well about addict brain, I'm sorry; it's a terrible affliction and the daily battle is exhausting. I went through it with alcohol for years - every morning on the way to work, or hungover at home, I'd think I am NOT drinking today. Cue me on the barstool at 5:15pm, "I'll have a hot n' dirty please!" Every. Damn. Day. Same thing with weed, I'd tell myself I wasn't smoking until 5pm and day after day I would fail and talk myself into it because it was no big deal. But it was a big deal, because I couldn't stop! There is no 'just a little' with me. Much like with alcohol, being a pothead became part of my identity. I didn't even mind it, which is a little weird, but we tell ourselves crazy things to feel better about stuff that we know deep down isn't right.

I recently left a 20+ year career in corporate accounting to switch gears, start writing and earn income on my own terms through various streams. I am the happiest and healthiest I have been in all of my 45 years, I have a new sense of purpose and drive, I have a vision of what my future holds and it's BIG. One of the ways I earn money is as a marketer for a clean label wellness brand, Modere. I've seen incredible improvements in my hair, skin, nails and total wellness since I started taking the supplements that Modere makes using clean ingredients, which is a big reason why I'm happy to rep their products using an affiliate code and help others do the same. Last year, Modere released a plant-based supplement for women's hormone health, and as a middle-aged woman in peri-menopause I needed it. If you're wondering what this has to do with me being a pothead, get this: I saw a significant decrease in my urges to smoke once my hormonal balance was in check. It was wild, suddenly I wasn't having a problem not smoking until 5, and many days it was 7pm or later before I realized that I hadn't smoked yet that day (at which point I would immediately huff down several bong hits to rectify the situation like a good little addict). But I was intrigued at the sudden change in my habits so I spent some time with my old pal google to see if there could possibly be a link between hormones and addictive behavior patterns....as it turns out, there's a huge, well documented link between the two. I spent hours reading about all the trials and evidence; I was happy to be smoking less, and even happier to have an explanation as to why all of a sudden I could control my urges easier.

And then it happened: for the first time ever I thought, I'm going to stop smoking. I have never had that thought in my life, I assumed I'd be rolling doobies in the nursing home. Suddenly I wanted to see what I could accomplish if I wasn't high all the time, and so I quit, just like that. Last week I celebrated six months of total sobriety and literally everything in my life has improved. I'm sleeping better, have less anxiety, improved clarity and focus, increase in productivity, more control over my nutrition, improvement in my struggle to be on time for things....so many improvements. It's a little crazy that I was so scared to give this habit up because I thought I needed it for anxiety, creativity, sleep, relaxation and other stories that I told myself. Nope, all false. I am 10,000% better without it! Today was further proof of that because I hiked not one but TWO peaks over 5,000 feet in elevation with a smile on my face. I assure you my pothead lungs could not have done that. We can do hard things, and be better off for it - I'm rooting for you! Shoot me a message if I can help you achieve something big, I've learned lots of pro tips along the way and some tell me I'm a great accountability partner.